Why hello there you beautiful soul!
Thanks for coming and reading today's blog post!
As of right now I have very little idea of where I want to take it so we will take this journey together, mmkay?
Let's start where the other post left off: our family without a home living in the very temporary housing on base and having a difficult time finding a place to live OFF base as well as letting go the fantasies about living ON base. Interestingly enough the blog post I had just written and published June 22nd, "My Nations Call Pt. 1", came in handy when Da Beast and I had a really good conversation about "letting OUR ideal's go even when we KNOW there is something better in store". My experiences, feelings, and revelations were so fresh on my mind that when it came time to address the way each of us disjointedly assessed the problem of figuring out where to live, it laid a good foundation of conversation approach. There was no blame laid on one or the other, just the opportunity to lay out what was on each of our hearts and how we could bring them together in our goals for finding our family a home and discovering what might be holding us back.
If it wasn't clear, our desire for living on base was hindering the action of finding a place off base. It was another run of the spiritual art of letting go and I felt grateful for the once frustrating time. That experience allowed us to move forward, together by letting go together.
The next day, June 24th, Da Beast was on the phone with a master sergeant and a technical staff sergeant about the difficulties of finding a home off base. They asked him all sorts of questions and then they hung up. Da Beast was making tons of calls to apartments and homes for rent and even applying to some and after the call continued reaching out as well as extending our time as much as we could at the temporary housing. After about 10-15 minutes he gets a call and I can hear excitement and surprise in his voice. He comes out of the bedroom and looks at me. My heart pounds in the confirmation in what I feel like he's going to say. He puts the caller on hold and tells me that he was on the phone with base housing and they have a house available for us as early as tomorrow. I sat there stunned and in awe of the miracles that just worked out in front of me. Here is what Da Beast was thinking about this situation,
"I had just called to see where we were on the on base housing and it was 3rd. Then my supervisor called because he was very aware of our issues with trying to find a place to live and was going to pass some information along to those higher ups in our command. Within 15 minutes of me talking to him he had several master sergeants on a conference call with me, all looking at real estate websites trying to find places for us. I was on the phone for about another 15 minutes when they said to just keep looking and they would forward anything they found to me. Another 10 minutes goes by and I was getting a call from housing saying they had a house to offer us and it was ready for immediate move in. I called my supervisor back and he started laughing and said he knew that one of the master sergeants was on the phone with housing to see what could be done on our behalf. Whatever they did it worked. It was amazing and we couldn't be more grateful."
We both couldn't believe it was real but we also weren't going to question any further what we were being given.
With very little mental preparation for this sudden turn around and very little belongings with us we checked out of temporary housing and moved into our base house June 25th 2021, just in time for Da Beast to be put on "housing leave". This was a time to search for housing if we didn't already have it and to settle our belongings if we had them, which we didn't. The moving company was short staffed and as far as we knew our things were still waiting to be shipped.
Before the nine duty days, or almost two weeks, housing leave and unrelated to looking for a house (which did consume a lot of Da Beast's time) he also began his "In Processing". This started by talking to the processing coordinator to schedule a meeting at the welcome center where he had to be briefed by three different people: The first person was over resources such as daycare, spouse employment opportunities, on-base living, base amenities, and the scheduling of FTAC (First Term Airman Course) which was scheduled for after housing leave; The second person was over dorm living arrangements which Da Beast didn't need to talk to for very long; and the third person was over financial reimbursements for moving-travel.
During the two week housing leave we waited around and contacted the moving company and our TMO (traffic management office) representative, we went to Sacramento to celebrate the fourth of July,
Independence Day Parade in Rancho Cordova, CA
Sacramento State Capital Building
It could just be because I'm a noob to the area but I couldn't find any places that had shaved ice which is a yearly tradition for us for the fourth of July. I DID however find something close called
Gunther's where they take a real fruit freeze and place a layer of vanilla ice cream in the middle. It's called the 50/50 and it's fantastic. The place is so crazy good that there was a decently long line we had to wait in to try these. A few weeks later and I'm still craving them. We have raspberry fruit freeze on the left and orange on the right.
Sometime within this two weeks we also had to buy a new air mattress because the one we brought popped at 1am which was fun. For the rest of this nine duty day housing leave we did everything on the floor, bought some necessary items such as towels, linen, and cookware that could be reimbursed. We also purchased some "not-so-necessary" items that will not be reimbursed but we knew we were going to replace anyway such as a new table which was being shipped from Florida and didn't arrive until we were finally getting our shipment of furniture. At the very end of the nine duty day leave we finally had a truck show up with our belongings:
Yes...all we owned fit into those few crates loaded up on that truck. I couldn't believe it either however we did move from a two bedroom with one bathroom apartment into a three bedroom two and a half bathroom house so I guess it wouldn't look like very much. I am surprised however at how everything fits inside the home and there's not a lot of just "empty" space.
After the housing leave Da Beast's In-Processing continued with his First-Term Airman Course Week which consisted of a class everyday covering different topics such as communication, trust, loyalty, commitment, personal values and qualities, resilience training covering human relationships/bias's, behavioral psychology, sexual assault/abuse, as well as Community College of the Air Force and opportunities to advance/continue education. After FTAC Da Beast then went back to his 'shop', or building, where he works with others. He is now completing specific computer based training's to gear him up for his Cyber Security job. Currently he needs assistance to jobs but once his training is complete he'll be a technician much like he was at his internet jobs where he'll get a problem and go fix it.
While Da Beast has been at work we got back into a routine at home and are processing our own place here. This could be left at the more simple "where we fit in at Beale AFB or in the military in general", because that alone would be enough of an explanation but it goes even deeper than that. We've not just been marveling at and even doubting that this military life is now something we're apart of, but we've had lessons coming to us in the same fashion as the term
I've coined for myself since 2017 as "Life Lessons". This time life wanted us to know how crucial our part is in our Heavenly Parents plan.
The lesson started long before these past few weeks with a call from a soon to be very good friend. She had told me that she was reading and looking into what her "why" was. What was one word that could explain everything she did? What was the motivation and purpose she was contributing to the world? Her's was 'mother' and
mine I found out was 'joy'. Everything I've ever wanted to had an end goal of helping others find resolve, feel important, feel empowered, feel seen, laugh, and all around find enjoyment. It is more difficult to feel the great joy of life when you feel lost, insignificant, powerless, or rejected. Where is the fulfillment? I believe it is a mission of mine to help those around me find it.
I am on the shore.
Since this conversation in May of last year I've picked up thoughts here and there, feeling like I was playing the devils advocate, always asking "what if we're all doing exactly what we were supposed to be doing?" This thought felt contrary to the belief of the whole missionary work of the Gospel of Christ, repentance from sin, and essentially becoming better than we are. But what if as we are ends there? What if we just 'are'? This is a difficult thing to wrap your head around when you hold a VIP card in your own beliefs on life and truth. How could God have [insert lack of spiritual understanding] in His plan? This seems counter productive to His plan of Happiness. Surely those who leave church, the gospel, and religion behind are unhappy. Right?
I don't think so.
I think they're right where they need to be.
I think they're brave.
They ran into the ocean.
Months of this thought on repeat connected to when I decided to study Isaiah with the companionship book,
"Understanding Isaiah," By Parry, Parry, and Peterson I felt the pain for those who were "lost" being judged and cast out of Heaven during Christ's second coming. What if the "lesser" choices we made in life were chain reactions from something we experience and are trying to explain to ourselves? Would they be judged so harshly for their sins because someone
else influenced their choice? Isn't
failure apart of His plan? Would there not be a time between the second coming of Christ and the judgement day to truly sort out the TRUE desires of our hearts not just the influences desires? I believe that is why Christ will come again. He will be there to sort out all we could not and to make sure we have a clear view of what our options are and then help us to attain them. Through this spiritual experience I was told I was to be apart of that. I am to be going out, walking with, and welcoming everyone home. I am to help them find joy THROUGH Christ. Not because I preach to them but because I
see them. As. They. Are. This is MY purpose and yours may look different. It's SUPPOSED to look different. Another thing I learned from Isaiah is that God has a part for each of us to play in his plan. The Israelite's were questioning God and at the time everyone was making poorer choices. God has the wicked and bloodthirsty king of the Babylonians conquer land and put the Israelite into captivity...again. Later along this same story-line and now my studying within this past month in enters Cyrus. He doesn't know God but he still listened to what the spirit prompted him to do and his way was paved before him. He was able to conquer Babel without a fight and the Israelite's were freed but doubted that God would include such a man to do so! He wasn't religious! He wasn't from the house of Israel! He was Persian! But God knew that Cyrus was what the people
needed. There was a whole chapter dedicated to questioning God and his mysteries verses asking humbly to know and understand so we can better fulfill our purpose in His plan. Working with God instead of telling him how it "works." The miracles will then reveal themselves.
I am standing right next to the water.
Fast forward to this past month when I watched a conversation between
Al Caraway and
Charlie Bird I was finally given the key to unlock all of these thoughts and my own purpose in His plan. Charlie said something along the lines of: "In the family, the proclamation to the world is doesn't say anything about homosexuality. All it says is that man and woman were ordained of God, which I think is beautiful. That means that man and woman had a specific reason and purpose to His plan,
NOT that those with same sex attraction had no part of it."
He has his feet in the water.
When he said that a light bulb just went off in my head and I felt the truth of that all the way to my heart.
This was the explanation I had been waiting for! This put it all together for me. We ALL have a purpose in this life, we are all needed, and we all add value and beauty to it. The trick is figuring out what that is and then being brave enough to go and fulfill it
one moment at a time. The goal is to work together and realize that no one persons "purpose" is better or holier than another. God clearly defines his specific purposes for His plan of happiness, has given us ALL the opportunity to participate in it, and how to obtain it. Like all the different factions to operate a business (taking the paychecks out of it). Or a machine. In order for it to function each part must do what it was destined or designed or purposed to do. In a business there are usually opportunities to expand your knowledge and expertise to obtain a different job. You have requirements to obtain it should you wish to but you don't HAVE to. If you are the happiest and feel your fulfillment and purpose in one aspect of the business you don't need to be anything else and you shouldn't be anything else! It was as if that job was
made for you, because in life it
was. If you don't play your part than who will? But should you feel the desire for something different, take the time to get there because eventually you'll find it. The goal is that we all work together while we find our places in His magnificent plan.
That being said...
Let's imagine an island in the middle of the sea. There is no other land but this land and there are people placed all over the island and even far out into the sea. You can't move from the place you've been put because it requires your specific perspective. This requires you to work with those who are around you. If you are on the island this may look like trading places or passing things along towards the middle of the island and back. It's a network. But what about those that are out in sea? The ocean waves are strong and making it difficult to make it to the island. Some islander people think that the ocean people don't belong on the island or that they won't "fit". Some see that the ocean people need help but are to far inland that they're not sure how to do that. Some islanders are scared to touch the ocean because they're not sure if they would be able to get back to the island. Some are standing on the shore right next to the water and some are standing in the water. There are those that are curious and so they leave the land to experience the ocean. And then their are those with a large capacity for love and compassion that they can't stand the separation and they run straight into the ocean to either join the ocean people or to try and bring the ocean people to the island with them. As they are running towards the ocean with their singular focus they can hear the worry of some of the inland people as they exclaim that they will be "lost" and "unhappy" in the waters. They feel confused but know their purpose is in the waves next to the others. The one standing on the shore thinks they must be brave to do so and tells them that if they should ever need a hand back onto the land that they will be waiting there for them. Another on the shore shirks at the idea of touching an ocean person because what if they "pull them in after them". It's better to just never be apart of the ocean even one tiny bit because deep down they think they aren't strong enough to resist the temptation. Once the runner makes it out to the ocean he discovers that there are many beautiful and some lonely souls just floating along. The runner desires to link arms with them, and then another, and then another. After many years of the runner feeling like they have been living each moment with purpose they look back towards the shore and remember their friend who said they'd be waiting if they ever needed a hand back onto land. The runner discusses this with their friends and discovers that most of them always wondered what the island was like but didn't think they'd fit in. A few said they were more comfortable in the water and land scared them. Another few said they felt they were where they needed to be in the water. Another few said they were going to go explore more ocean and share what they knew with the rest of the ocean people. Finally there were a few that said they'd like to go back to the shore with the runner. The runner and their friends make it back to the shore where they are rejected by some but not by others. Some of them went back to the water offended, some went back to the water to share what they knew, some went back to the water because it was all they knew, and yes some stayed because they felt they had finally found their purpose.
Where are you in the story?
What is your purpose you are living and contributing?
I am standing on the shore right next to the water thinking that those who ran out into the ocean are brave and if they ever want to come to the island again I'll be here waiting for them with an outstretched hand to accept. I'm watching the ocean and the people in it wanting to know each story they are living and also knowing that I'm right where I'm supposed to be. If I wasn't how would those in the middle of the sea know where to go if they wanted to go to land? If it weren't for those in the middle of the sea or venturing the sea how would those way out in sea know anything different? How would they know that they have so many options to choose from?
What is your purpose in this moment?
What drives you?
What makes you feel that "win"?
What puts that fight in you?
What gets under your wings and helps you fly?
Whatever that is, whatever it looks like, when you are doing what you feel inspired to do you will be just where you need to be. You will be walking the path made for you. When you align yourself with your purpose you will discover that everything you've been learning throughout your life has led you to these designed moments and then there will be a time to teach what you know to others. To share. To challenge them and help them grow in their purpose. Not the one you think they should be living but the one they are living.
You have a part. You ARE significant. And you'll know where to find me if you ever need a hand onto land.
xoxo
Megan
