Part Two to the blog post about ‘Body Language’. Writing began on the 7th of January, 2025.
Although my main focus was to gain a relationship with my body I did also have other motivations and a specific weight goal. Roughly around September of 2023 is when I became aware of how much weight I had accumulated and would continue to do so if I hadn’t become aware of where I was and how I was ignoring all of the signals from my body.
We had a Disneyland trip coming up in March of 2024 and I knew that if I were to go in my current state I’d have a much more difficult time getting around and less enjoyment while I was there. So I set a goal to loose 20 pounds by that Disneyland trip, but even if I didn’t meet it, it would be okay because my actual goal was health improvements.
As I left off in the last blog post, I was going to our gym on base. This gym had a play area for kids so I could watch them and work out at the same time, which was seriously the best thing ever and I think all gyms should have it. On average, I was working out for about 20 minutes with whatever felt right, about three days a week.
If I was feeling more sluggish and unmotivated to work out I’d walk the treadmill or stationary bike that whole 20 minutes; If I felt like my thighs or glutes needed some focus I’d work on the hip abductor/adductor machine, the leg press machine, and or the hamstring leg-curling-lying machine; Sometimes I felt the need to target my torso, so I would use the rotary torso machine; and then more towards the end I felt like my arms could use a little workout too so I’d occasionally do tricep curls using a sitting triceps extension machine that had a separate pull for each arm which would start above the head and then extend outward and down.
Oftentimes I worked with the menstrual cycle ideology of being more gentle in workouts at the tale end of one cycle and the very beginning of the next cycle. There is a lot more in depth information about this out in this cyber world including specific exercises to when and the reasons behind it but in order to gain actual success in my health journey the more simple the better. What this actually comes down to is as stated above and in the previous blog post: listen to your bodies needs. If your body is sore, tired, sluggish and grumpy don’t do a rigorous exercise and push it to the brink of insanity and a breakdown. Don’t let it just lay there either because bodies need movement. It might want to be a couch potato all day but you go to the gym anyway. Just give it a more gentle workout instead.
Because I started going to the gym, as I stated in my previous blog post, my weight didn’t really go anywhere. It would fluctuate and occasionally move down a pound or two and then fluctuate there. I had to remind myself many times that my main goal was health, not losing 20 pounds! Especially the closer we got to our trip when I got SO close to weighing my goal weight of 130lbs.
I didn’t make that goal but I was extremely close and even better was I enjoyed that trip. Because I had strengthen up my muscles I was able to avoid many physical discomforts. I felt good and that was what I really wanted.
Then when we got home from our trip I got a little surprise of seeing 130 pounds more often than not.
All of 2024, right up until September when we moved to a whole other country, I kept up with everything as best as I could but I was looking for the next thing and thought I had found it in “Fasting like a Girl” by Dr. Mindy Pelz. After our Disneyland trip we had a family reunion for my husbands side of the family where my sister in law told me all about Dr. Mindy Pelz and even gifted me the book above. Overall the ideas from Dr. Pelzs research sounded like my next right step and because it went with the woman’s menstrual cycle, and I had just began a new one, I jumped right in.
That was a mistake.
And not because it didn’t work to some extent but because it left my body feeling betrayed. I had just spent the past six months working on strengthening my relationship to my body in simple and loving steps. I was working on listening to it and now all of a sudden without any warning I wasn’t feeding it at all or wouldn’t let it have certain foods because according to Mindy Pelz, there are foods to avoid if you’re looking for optimization while following a fasting schedule. It was never pushed. There were many clearly put instances that fasting alone, even if you ate pizza right afterwards, was still beneficial. In fact there were lots of good insights and experiences as I experimented with the 'what I thought might be' my next step.
Because it’s difficult to understand tone from words written down before I move on I would like to just clearly state that there is nothing inherently wrong about “Fasting like a Girl” and I still believe that there is something I needed from experimenting with it and there are still parts of it that I want to incorporate but because I had approached it the way I did it left me in this strange land of uncertainty for the rest of 2024. I had done the very thing I was hoping to avoid when starting this journey which was to essentially keep my focus of progression and not of perfection. It was to keep my communication open with my body, to listen, to strengthen, and to hold healthy boundaries.
I had crossed all those boundaries and my body was mad; not in the sense that it didn’t feel great, but in the same characterization I’ve been giving it in these blog posts as a real and living being.
I didn’t know where to go and when we moved and I wanted to try all the 'new to me foods' put in front of me with very little resolve and restraint I’m now in another reality check figuring out my next steps.
I’d like to change a bit of what I said in my last post, stage four, to fit this situation, perhaps even as a step 5.
Fifth, Simplify.
If you try something new and it doesn’t work how you expected, or worse it seems like you’ve set yourself back, don’t take this as a reflection that you’re not doing enough of the “right things”. If anything it might be a reflection that you are doing TOO much of these “right things”. This could be too much eating again, too much exercising, too much restriction, or even something that is too foreign to you right now in where you are at. Remember that you’re ever revolving in a boundary cycle. You’ve taken initiative to try something new, you’ve found new things that work and ones that’s definitely don’t, you may feel lost and frustrated because the errors outweigh the efforts right now, you may see the benefits of what you’re wanting to try but it’s just not for you right now, and you may even be avoiding the things you feel you need to do because you don’t want to face the grief of giving up something you’ve grown attached to. This is where I am at right now.
Sometimes I think we try something new so that we don’t have to face what is already there to be worked with. As if trying this new thing will fix our problems so we can still have what it is we’re wanting. Inflammation, hormone imbalance, and blood sugar levels are all topics that have been on my radar that, if handled correctly, I feel like could help me to feel better. But in order to follow this path to the next step I might have to let go of things I love to eat or even the expectations I have.
This is the step that might feel the most disappointing because you were doing SO good and making real progress! At this reevaluation pit stop I think it might be a good time to highlight the popularity of diets seeing as that’s what really throws most of us off, only making it harder to “start up” again the next go around. That’s what threw me off, and as I stated previously there isn’t anything inherently wrong with the "Fast like a Girl" diet or really any other diets for that matter. In my opinion, all diets have just as many people who praise it as it does just as many who tear it apart. I’ve come to the conclusion, from not only trying a few myself over the years but also by observation, that with most if not all “diets” there is always a simple truth that is fluffed up to make it more than it is.
Remember, this journey, or rather this step specifically, isn’t about you not doing enough of the “right things” but more focused on how there are too many “right things” to do. My opinion is as humans we like to take the simple things and make them overly complicated. Mostly I think this is something we feel is necessary because how else can you not only tell someone else about it being successful but also have them also believe in it? Especially because most people discount simplicity even if we all crave it. Maybe it’s a trust issue thing. Maybe it’s just me talking to future me who ends up struggling again.
The thing is, is regardless of the amount of fluff, or supporting evidence that surrounds it, the simple truth it still rings. It’s still interacting with every soul looking for it in one way or the other. The difference is what kind of attention we give to it, how much overthinking we give to it, or how much we try to ignore it because it doesn’t fit personal narratives.
Without further staying off on the whole general truth topic I’m so passionate about, let’s bring this back to what this has to do with diets. Although I’ve observed many different diets in this post I’ll just stick with ones I’ve tried a well as ones that have spoken a truth to me.
Raw food Diet - this diet I didn’t actually try as a diet but I did do a zucchini lemon noodle recipe once that I liked a lot and I’ve been drawn to it because of its main truth: eat naturally .
Paleo/Whole30 - This was probably the first diet I actually tried. Although like with all of the diets I’ll be discussing I didn’t try it to its exactness. In my opinion, that’s actually one reason I feel most diets fail: they’re too ridged. There is no room to customize for your personal dietary needs. There are rules, restrictions, restrictions disguised as guidelines, timelines, an over abundance of supporting research, evidence, testimonials or proof, expenses, and probably more I’m missing. When did we make the simple act of eating so complicated? Most of the answer to this question comes down to a void that someone felt needed to be filled such as health issues, downhill in the quality of consumed products, political agendas, processes and quick food production, financial situations, and again probably more than what I’m listing here.
When people look for answers, others who have pioneered in those questions share what answers they have found. It’s always been this way, diets or not. Unsatisfied with answers, people will continue to look. However, as stated previously, this often leads to overlooking the truth. In a search for answers we can stray very far from the very simple truth that’s been there all along. The whole 30 diet for example, I tried in part because I was pregnant with a chronic yeast infection. I also tried it because some others in our life at the time were trying it. I felt pretty good on that diet even though I didn’t follow it completely. I found recipes I really enjoyed and still think about today but it’s influence in my life was short lived due to the strict regime and 30 day rule. What is the truth this diet shares that can be overlooked by it's rules or frustrations? Eat food as unprocessed as possible. That’s it! Everything else about the diet is just one out of many possibilities to turn the idea into reality. I’m really grateful, even today, for this diet because it has allowed a lot of healthy replacements for things I’ve loved but that do not have healthy ingredients.
Calorie Counting Diet - This one probably has aligned with me the most and the one I was following post pregnancy in 2017. The particular diet I followed was led by “Fitness Carli” on Instagram. At the time that was her Instagram handle but I believe it has now changed. It’s the only diet program I followed the most closely as her method was to simplify as much as possible and I could still have some foods I liked that she labeled as “sanity points”. She had food groups with certain calories to have in each and a simple one page form you could fill in. You could even be apart of her challenges and online support groups. She was an example of success and many others also gained success from her meal plan and program and continue to, even with her major life challenges of beating cancer and shifting her program and rebranding. The reason this program didn’t stick is I stressed about how many calories were in foods and that I wasn’t being exact with those calories. It was also for weight loss and at a time I was having postpartum anxiety and depression. The truth about calorie counting diets? We should eat only what our bodies are needing and educate ourselves of good, better and best fueling sources.
Three Day Military Diet - with my husband joining the Air Force I was very interested in ways he could prepare for that and what kinds of foods they would eat at BMT. That’s where I found the three day diet. This diet was really more for fun but it still taught me about not limiting yourself just because you believe that certain food should go together or that you have to be stuck in "exactness" because a recipe call for certain foods to go together. For example hotdogs and buns usually go together but in the Military diet they were eaten without buns, Crackers and cheese were all there was for lunch, and for breakfast sometimes it was a single peanut butter toast with a half of a grapefruit. Was this a sustainable diet? No way! It still wasn't a good diet even when I did try to make it better by taking the same principal of watching the amount eaten and making similar meals for a whole month.
Vegan Diet - This diet has grown in popularity and because of it more animal free products have become available for everyone. Even more so it’s been more achievable because of women like Tabitha Brown who shows that being vegan doesn’t have to be complicated. I was drawn to this diet for its main truth of respecting life. It also helped my sensitivity to eggs and dairy by giving me recipes that don't have those. I still ate meat but by adding many vegan or vegetarian recipes makes it easier for eating meat more sparingly and consciously. I believe eating meat is essential to life but it doesn’t need to be the spotlight to the meals and we should respect the life given to sustain us and our families. The vegan diet isn’t sustainable because of this, in my opinion, but also because it’s a highly processed diet which goes against other diets that root for Whole Foods (unless you’re going more raw vegan and eating only vegetables, fruits, and simple grains and legumes as pure as possible).
Anti inflammatory, Blood Sugar, and Hormones - There were a lot of diets I was eyeballing during this time such as the GERD diet because I was feeling a lot of acid reflux. Most of my acid reflux was solved by just eating less, not by following a diet. It also didn’t feel right so I didn’t get into it, I also looked into the anti inflammatory diets and elimination diet because I felt like I was still having reactions to certain foods such as dairy and eggs. These were hit and miss. Sometimes I’d be fine eating eggs or drinking dairy and could never really figure out these sensitivity triggers. This drew me to anti inflammatory diets and elimination diets but I also didn’t look too much into those because those seemed to restrictive for me and to be REAL honest I didn’t want to give up what I loved: cheese. Something I was also drawn to that I have been trying and feel like it works is seed cycling which helps with hormone health. Finally, my blood sugar which goes hand in hand with hormone health and the intermittent fasting below. I haven’t gotten into this completely but I have been able to replace a few food items already in my diet for more stable blood sugar like sugar alternatives such as coconut sugar and honey. The truth exposed within these diets is finding the root cause. No diet will serve you well if you don't understand first how these foods interact with your own body and why some foods cause reactions.
Intermittent Fasting - Before I attempted the fast like a girl diet I tried many times to put together what felt like the right course of action for meal planning for myself and my family and every time I thought I had it all figured out I’d find other reasons it didn’t work. Then as stated at the beginning of this post I felt like fasting was my next step because of its main truth; Aside from it’s spiritual benefits, is it’s ability to detox, restart, and refresh the whole body. I’m not going to go into all the details Dr. Mindy Pelz says, mostly because I’m trying to simplify things and I already feel like I've added too much to this blog post, however to paraphrase her work: fasting allows the body to completely heal itself, deeply. I got so excited about this because I was doing everything else I felt I could do and this sounded like a nice fresh start but the reasons it didn’t stick are very similar to those of the other diets: it was overly complex: eat during these 5 days, don’t have carbs during these 5 days, fast during these days, have apple cider vinegar everyday, etc. I still think this is an important truth to implement in my life but it needs to be more simplified so it’ll actually stick and become an actual change for my life.
Sixth, attachment.
Identify your attachments. If you don’t know or are ignoring your attachments you won’t know what it is that’s working against you. Starting off by asking yourself 'why is it I eat this' is a good place to start. Is it because you’re actually hungry or are there other reasons? Are you bored? Are you craving something? Is the food just readily available so you eat some? Are you afraid of missing out because friends or family are eating at a time you’re not actually hungry? Is it something new you’ve never tried and you really want to? Are you the primary meal provider and since you have to make all the food you might as well eat now? Are you projecting your hunger cues to come at a bad time so if you’re going to eat you better eat now?
Are you holding onto food that your body is rejecting because you love it? Why do you love it? Is there a good enough replacement that is better for your body?
To help yourself with these attachments, craft a plan that slowly incorporates what is best for you and your body. Use what you’ve learned about what your body needs from the simplifying step where you identified what drew you to certain diets and what their main purposes were. Reflect on why certain foods feel comforting or necessary. Journaling about your thoughts before and after meals can help identify patterns. Create non-food-based rituals (e.g., stretching, meditating, or drinking tea) to fill emotional gaps.
Seventh, resilience.
Practice intuitive eating practices. This can help to strengthen your responses to your body’s cues. If you listen to it now it may be more likely that it’ll listen to you later. For example if you’re not hungry but you project hunger at an hour, say nine in the evening because you're not hungry at six, don’t just eat for the sake of trying to avoid being hungry at that late hour. If you’re needing to make food for your starving family but you’re not actually hungry don’t just eat because the food is there and they are eating. Sit with them and enjoy their presence.
When you are hungry create an environment for peaceful eating. Make plans to lessen the stress of not knowing what to make for dinner, allow yourself plenty of time to enjoy the process of preparing those meals, and consciously eat more slowly regardless of the chaos that may be present around you.
Practicing these minor bouts of only eating when you actually need to will help you get to fasting for longer periods of time especially now that you’ve addressed your attachments and made more healthy replacements.
Once you feel like your truly listening to when and what your body needs and supplying it with good foods to support all of your goals you can stretch those periods of time between eating just a bit longer, testing out things like going down to two meals verses three. Keep a log of how your body feels with these changes. Celebrate milestones, like successfully pausing between meals or completing a mini-fast. View fasting as a positive, refreshing step rather than deprivation. Visualize how fasting will benefit your energy, health, and goals, reinforcing a healthy relationship with it.
Eighth, fasting.
Once you’ve established a balanced relationship with food and reduced emotional attachments, gradually ease into fasting. Here’s how:
Start Small:
- Begin with short fasts (12–16 hours overnight, including sleep) and slowly extend as your body adapts.
- Practice intermittent fasting one or two days per week before committing to longer periods.
Hydrate and Support Your Body:
- Focus on hydration with water, herbal teas, and electrolytes.
- Add lemon, ACV, cucumber, or mint to water.
- Coconut water is also good.
- Focus on teas such as turmeric, dandelion root, peppermint, ginger, hibiscus, cinnamon, moringa, tulsi, ginseng and fennel.
- Include nutrient-dense meals during eating periods to ensure your body feels nourished.
- Foods such as pineapple, papayas, sauerkraut, kefir, kimchi, yogurt, avocado, spinach, kale, and arugula are good detox supporters.
- Add liver and kidney supports such as milk thistle, 100% cranberry juice, and turmeric or cur-cumin.
Monitor Your Mental and Physical State:
- Keep track of how fasting affects your energy levels and emotions. Adjust as needed to avoid burnout.
- Focus on gentle movement, sweating, and epsom salt baths.
Celebrate Progress:
- Recognize small wins along the way, whether it’s successfully sticking to a fasting period or noticing improvements in how you feel.
- Refine & Evolve
- Once fasting becomes more natural, focus on optimizing and evolving your entire approach. Revisit your goals, adjust your methods, and continue listening to your body.
